"This is an open letter to all husbands of future potential female bodybuilders, fitness, and physique competitors..."(from Paul Peavy).





Paul Peavy is a Licensed Psychotherapist, Professional Speaker, and Life Coach. He is a former stand-up comic so his presentations and articles are always creative and lively. His personal mission statement is to help people make choices that energize their lives and help them rediscover the joy in life. His energy and enthusiasm have led to an appearance on DisneyWorld's 25th Anniversary Video and membership on Team Naya Drinking Water's “Thirst for Life” Team. To find out more about Paul visit www.paulpeavy.com

"Dear poor unsuspecting, excited like a puppy waiting for a dog biscuit, naïve soul.........................".

"I know when your wife said she wanted to enter a bodybuilding or fitness competition your eyes lit up as you imagined yourself telling your high school buds that yes, you are now married to a Greek goddess. Or you imagined all those energetic back flips and splits occurring under your roof. (Note to women: somehow men always think gymnastics routines can somehow be transferred to the bedroom. Note to men: You see if she actually… never mind, don't let something like physics stand in the way of your little dreams.) Or you just imagined yourself walking into a restaurant with this deeply tanned woman, wearing a little black dress that had had more curves it than a country road in the Smokey Mountains and you could feel the breeze from so many heads turning to see this picture perfect work of art coming through the door. Please, please cling to these memories and fantasies. Because my poor, sweet, dear man you are in for 6-12 weeks of a marital roller coaster. At first the fun and enthusiasm of working out and eating well will be invigorating for both of you. You may even enjoy working out together. Then something rather embarrassing will happen. She will beat you in a hundred meter dash. You will say, “I had a bad start.” She will beat you again and you will go as far as to say, “The headwind was stronger in my lane than yours.” She will beat you again and at this point you should say, “You know honey instead of running together I think it would be more helpful if I timed you and watched to make sure you held your form.” You will exclaim, “Wow, that's great!” when she tells you how much she did on the hamstring curl machine. The next day, you nearly tear your hamstrings trying to make sure you are staying ahead of her on that. She will talk about a “cheat day”. Do not be concerned about her interest in another man. She does not have the time, energy, or even the faintest interest in that. She is talking about cheating with a piece of chocolate or slice of pizza. This will make her a very happy person on this day. Look forward to cheat days. They make everybody's life better. As the competition nears she will try to do something called carb cutting or carb depletion. This is scarier than it sounds. Something as innocent sounding as a carb should not cause a big problem. However let it be known that I believe when they start to clone women, the main ingredients will probably be carbs. I am sure it is related to mood stabilization. My guess it is the main feeder fuel in the female libido. Forget any kind of goat weed or monkey tree, I'm thinking of taking day old doughnuts and marketing them as “O” Rings or day old muffins as Love Muffins. You will need to practice a few words and remember this will be the only acceptable part of any dialogue you will have with your wife for the last two weeks. These phrases are, “Yes, dear,” and “Man, you look great, awesome, perfect!” Her part of the dialogue will go something like, “My butt needs to be a little bit tighter.” Now, her buns will be so rock solid that you could bounce a quarter off of them and poke your eye out. But no matter how many times you say, “Man, you look great, awesome, perfect!” She will hold to this belief. Now after the contest your phraseology will change depending on if she wins or loses. Yes, she will only see winning or losing. Second place will not mean anything to her. So if she wins, the correct phrase is, “Wow! Those judges sure were tough but they knew quality when they saw it.” If she loses, you may choose the words you use but the message needs to be along the lines of, “You were robbed! Those judges were blind!” To establish the final rule I want you to visualize that you are eleven years old and going to the Baseball Hall of Fame. You are so excited and you go in and you see everything you've ever dreamed of. Babe Ruth's uniform, Ted Williams' bat, Hank Aaron's 715th homerun ball. Only in the middle of this fantastic trip do you realize that everything you'd love to touch is in a glass case. You can look but you cannot touch. This would be great advice just to think about during that last week before the contest. This is not your wife. This is a chiseled work of art. A finely tuned racecar. A delicately balanced piece of machinery. You want to make sure you know what you are doing before you try putting your fingerprints on this Picasso. One last piece of advice. When people come up to you and pat you on the back and say, “Man you are one lucky dude!” Just smile, nod your head and say, “Oh yeah, oh yeah!” Look, it's just best to leave some mythological fantasies alive."